It’s Not Your Fault!

10 Little-Known Factors Affecting Subconscious Beliefs

Newborn baby - subconscious beliefs

We may be the most loving, caring parents on the planet or have had wonderful parents ourselves, yet great parenting does not preclude us from accidentally creating faulty beliefs in our baby in utero and during or shortly after birth. With the limited inner resources a baby has, these faulty beliefs are absorbed directly into the subconscious mind as truth. Unless addressed at some later point in a therapeutic environment, these beliefs become the subconscious foundation for emotional and behavioural patterns for life, no matter how good the parenting is. Remember that the subconscious mind is like the 90% of an iceberg that lies unseen below the waterline.

Let me expand on the above:

In Utero

 

1. Mother’s Emotional State

Did you know that the baby in utero absorbs the mother’s emotions as if they were the baby’s own?  Time and time again I have been working with clients who have spontaneously regressed through energy work or hypnotherapy to being back in the womb. Things the client has little if any conscious awareness that their mother was feeling during pregnancy come to light. These have formed the basis of beliefs, faulty or otherwise, as the baby has not yet developed the filter of conscious critical analysis.

If you are familiar with the work of Rudolph Steiner, you will know that he wrote about the child being completely bound energetically into the mother’s energy field until age seven, so that whatever the mother goes through emotionally, the child will also pick up on this energy. It seems logical then that a baby also picks up the mother’s emotions in utero.

As about 50% of pregnancies are unplanned, a pregnant woman may be feeling fear or ambivalence about being pregnant. There may be financial worries associated with being pregnant or fear that she won’t be able to cope with a baby. She may even be considering having a termination and be feeling a great deal of anguish.

This could result in the baby absorbing emotions such as anxiety, fear, stress, guilt and worry.

As an example, by the time I was pregnant with my daughter I had already had six miscarriages and had just slightly over zero confidence that I could carry her to term. Every time I went to the bathroom I expected to see blood, the first sign that yet another miscarriage was starting. My anxiety levels were through the roof for the entire pregnancy, as well as having a particularly stressful corporate job at the time. Needless to say that my daughter was born with higher levels of stress and anxiety than most babies, as she had directly absorbed so much of my own fear.

 

2. Physical Trauma to Baby

Compound the mother’s emotional state during pregnancy with any physical trauma the baby may sustain, accidentally or otherwise, and I think you can begin to see the picture of how faulty beliefs can be formed.

Did you know that in some cultures it is common practice for a woman to be kicked in the stomach to deliberately abort the foetus? Of course that approach is not always successful. Imagine the trauma to the unborn child! Several of my clients have a mother who has been physically abused by the father in an abusive relationship during pregnancy, including punching and kicking.

Of course the physical trauma to the developing baby can be totally accidental, such as by slipping over or being injured in a car crash.

3 Key Faulty Beliefs = I am not loved. I am not wanted. I am not safe.

 

3. IVF

With many women choosing to start their families later in life, many are opting for IVF rather than risk spending years trying to successfully conceive. This is not the place for me to share my views on the pros and cons of In-Vitro Fertilisation.

Suffice it to say that all the women I know personally who have chosen the IVF route have been on an emotional roller coaster ride that has been both emotionally and financially draining. Especially in the early months of an IVF pregnancy the mother often has a great deal of fear of losing the pregnancy. This fear gets transmitted to the baby.

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

4. Maternal Illness

Most of we mothers have clear memories of ‘heaving our guts out’ with morning sickness for the first three months of pregnancy! However there are a number of mothers whose morning sickness is so prolonged and severe it requires hospitalization and being on a drip. Some mothers may develop gestational diabetes. A mother I know developed a severe heart condition during pregnancy that required long-term hospitalization. There can also be a multitude of other reasons that a mother gets sick that have nothing to do with the pregnancy.

All of the above can result in the developing baby in utero picking up her mother’s physical and emotional distress and becoming energetically out of balance.

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

Birth Factors

 

5. Premature Birth

Sometimes through unavoidable circumstances a baby comes into world much earlier than expected. Although from 28 weeks gestation onwards there is a good chance that the baby can survive – thanks to the wonders of modern medical intervention – what emotional affect does this have on the baby? Perhaps they have to spend lots of time alone in an incubator hooked up to all sorts of tubes and under harsh lights. There may also be a number of other distressed premature babies close by. At a critical time where cuddles, nurturing and comfort from mum are essential, they may of necessity be severely limited. The baby is deprived of essential emotional nutrients.

In my healing practice at Angel Wings Healing I have worked with many people with age regression using hypnotherapy where they have spontaneously gone back to the trauma of feeling ‘abandoned’ in an incubator.

Faulty Belief = I am not loved.

 

6. Induced Birth

It is quite a common practice for doctors to suggest inducing a woman to give birth when the baby is getting close to term. With my own daughter I was induced at the doctor’s request for multiple reasons, including me being physically unwell. The process of inducing a baby involves the mother being injected with chemicals to trigger intense contractions, so the baby tends to be born quicker than with a normal birth. Who knows what effect those chemicals have directly on the baby?

All I know for sure is that my own daughter was not ready to be born. Much to my surprise after her birth she kept giving me psychic messages that she wanted to be back inside me for at least another week!

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

7. Breech Birth

A breech birth is where the baby is in position to be delivered feet first rather than head first. The latter is obviously an easier passage. In many cases the baby can be carefully maneuvered into a better position for delivery. This in itself can be traumatizing for the baby as it upsets the feeling of safety in the uterine world.

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

8. Forceps Delivery

Using forceps to deliver a baby may be part of a breech delivery or because the baby seems to be stuck in the birth canal. Just imagine how you would feel in your warm, safe world if you were suddenly painfully dragged out of it by some unknown cold foreign object?

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

9. Stuck in Birth Canal / Prolonged Labour

For a whole variety of reasons beyond the scope of this article, a baby – and mother – may have to endure a prolonged labour. Apparently my mother was in labour for 36 hours with me as I was stuck in a breech position. No wonder she was on morphine for pain relief! Of course in the meantime I was being squashed and poked and prodded in the birth canal.

Little wonder that I had a full-blown panic attack at a ‘fun centre’ on the Gold Coast in Australia many years later as an adult when I was put into a soft, spongy, tiny, pitch-black room reminiscent of the womb and had to try to find my way out. The experience triggered the faulty beliefs of being in life-threatening danger that I had formed during my birth experience and which were still alive and well at the subconscious level!

Faulty Belief = I am not safe.

 

10. Umbilical Cord Wrapped around Neck

Further to my example above, when I did therapeutic work going back into the womb I was aware of constriction around my neck. My sense is the umbilical cord was also wrapped around my neck. At that time I felt I couldn’t breathe and was in fear of my life. Interestingly, I have had respiratory issues all my life.

Faulty Beliefs = I cannot breathe. I am not safe.

 

Conclusion

Something as simple as singing to your baby in utero, playing beautiful music or whispering gently to your baby while still in utero and telling her how much you love her can all have profoundly positive effects on the emotional health of your child. Such simple steps can set a strong foundation for life and help a child weather the storms of life better.

As you can see from the above 10 factors, which is by no means an exhaustive list, even those mothers who are loving and committed to being the best parents they can be can find themselves in circumstances that are detrimental to the beliefs of their child. There is no blame to apportion, nor should mothers feel guilty for any emotional or physical trauma their baby sustains in utero, during birth or shortly afterwards. That’s life. It is what it is.

It is impossible for you to know exactly what beliefs are in your child’s subconscious mind, although faulty beliefs may be reflected in your child’s behaviour in such things as bed-wetting, fussy eating, temper tantrums, aggressive outbursts, being bullied, and lack of confidence.

As the great parent that you are, you may be keen to undo any damage caused by faulty subconscious beliefs. The good news is that you can. I am an Accredited Goulding SleepTalk ® Consultant and can train you how to do this. SleepTalk® is based on the work of Norman Doidge, MD (The Brain that Changes Itself) and the principles of Neuroplasticity, in which repeated new life affirming beliefs can rewire the brain to take over from the old faulty beliefs. Find out More about SleepTalk® at https://unconditionallyloved.com.au

I can also work directly with you if you would like to address your own subconscious limiting beliefs that have kept you blocked from reaching your full potential. Find out more about working with me as a private client at Angel Wings Healing https://angelwings-healing.com

 

Bio:

Michelle Mayur is an Accredited Goulding SleepTalk® Consultant at www.unconditionallyloved.com.au and an Amazon #1 Bestselling Author for Embraced by the Divine The Emerging Woman’s Gateway to Power, Passion and Purpose. Michelle is a Member of the IACT (International Association of Counselors and Therapists) and is passionate about building strong self-esteem and emotional resilience in all children so they can reach their full potential. Since 1995, Michelle has been running her successful private practice, Angel Wings Healing, in Melbourne, Australia, and works with clients globally. She has been interviewed on numerous international radio shows and telesummits.

About Michelle Mayur

Specializing in Spiritual Healing, Isis Healing of Love and Hypnotherapy, Michelle Mayur is a channel for Divine Love and has worked in private practice as a healer since 1995 in Melbourne and abroad. Her private global clientele includes royalty, a mining company CEO, university faculty dean, a resort owner, Buddhist priests and a Catholic nun, to name a few.
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