The Origin of Faulty Beliefs
.Looking back, was your childhood carefree, playful and filled with joy and happy memories? Were your school days some of the happiest days of your life? Even though those are the stereotypes of childhood, the reality is often something vastly different … and may leave us emotionally scarred for life.
For me, my childhood was challenging, even though my parents both seemed loving towards me. One might say that my family was your average dysfunctional family. Basically my parents were good people who were struggling with their own emotional pain and were loving me, their only child, the best way they knew how to. They would readily sacrifice their own wants so that I did not go without things I really needed.
Dad worked hard in the company he started from scratch. He drank equally as hard as a vicious circle escape from Mum’s wrath about him coming home drunk and late most nights. I was always in bed by then, but was woken up by the incessant shouting and arguing. It would go on for seemingly hours. At the weekends Dad escaped to his ‘man cave’ to talk to people around the world on his ham radio equipment, rather than talk to his wife. Mum used me as the pawn in the middle and the power piece against Dad. I felt abandoned and unloved by him.
Both my parents were in their second marriage at a time when divorce was uncommon, especially for the son of a pious Anglican minister. They felt duty-bound to stick together, even though they despised each other. Over and over Mum would tell me that they were only together because of me. What a painful load for any child to bear, believing that I was somehow guilty or to blame for my parents’ distress! Little did Mum or I realize how damaging those repeated comments were to my subconscious mind. I was inadvertently programmed to believe that I was somehow defective or not good enough. This played out for many years as an adult … and required many years of self-healing.
I know I am not alone in this kind of scenario, repeated many times over in countries around the world. Perhaps the problem stems from learned dysfunctional coping strategies of the parents perpetuated down through the generations that lead to a child’s belief structure being based largely on fear, lack of confidence or a feeling of rejection or inadequacy. It may be something as simple as a parent blurting out words in frustration to their child after a hard day’s work such as, “How could you be so stupid?” (‘Stupid’ is a loaded word that can be especially damaging to a child’s self-esteem and confidence, compounding a belief they are not unconditionally loved.)
Even if your child is ‘asleep’ in the back of the car, at the level of the subconscious mind he or she is still hearing everything that is being said. Oops, do you now remember some of those things you were saying about your child when you thought they couldn’t hear?
Of course it is not just parents who may be to blame for the accidental faulty beliefs that children absorb directly into their subconscious mind, but it can also be the perceived criticisms of teachers and other authority figures, or even peers, siblings and other family members. If these are accepted uncritically as Truth by the subconscious mind, especially before age five, they can set the person up for a lifetime of feeling unloved, rejected, not worthy enough and with low self-esteem. These beliefs may play out in adulthood in such things as settling for second best in such things as choice of partner and in failure to strive to reach full potential.
So if you or someone you know has a child, who may be struggling emotionally, behaviourally, socially or with school work, then underlying faulty beliefs in the subconscious mind are likely to be the culprit. The Goulding SleepTalk® for Children Process is the answer to replacing these beliefs completely with new positive beliefs that create a firm foundation of feeling unconditionally loved and lovable with high self-esteem and emotional resilience that lasts for life.
In my next article I will be sharing more of the details about how the SleepTalk® process actually works and how it changes core beliefs. SleepTalk® has had astounding results for both children and parents around the world for over 40 years.
Michelle Mayur is an Accredited Goulding SleepTalk® Consultant at www.unconditionallyloved.com.au and an Amazon #1 Bestselling Author of Embraced by the Divine – The Emerging Woman’s Gateway to Power, Passion and Purpose. Michelle is a Member of the IACT (International Association of Counselors and Therapists) and is passionate about building strong self-esteem and emotional resilience in all children so they can reach their full potential. She also has a special interest in applying the principles of the Goulding SleepTalk® process to people of any age suffering from an ABI (Acquired Brain Injury) and is currently doing research into this. Since 1995, Michelle has been running her successful private practice, Angel Wings Healing, in Melbourne, Australia, and works with clients globally. She has been interviewed on numerous radio shows and telesummits.